Should I go? The question drifted within my mind, invading all of my other thoughts. I couldn’t stop thinking about it each moment of my day, and it had been keeping me awake at night. I yawned and stretched out my arms, leaning my back over the worn cushioning of the backrest of my quaint computer chair. I had already been tired, yet homework insisted that it take more from me.
“I should check on my guild,” I said to myself, double-clicking on Internet Explorer. I waited for my Yahoo! homepage to come up and remembered about my instant messenger. “Hmm,” I shrugged, “I’m not really doing much…I guess I can sign in.” After opening my guild’s page from my favorites menu, I clicked on Messages and read the most recent posts. “Huh, Hamster’s got a new riddle up and Rockerchik has updated the games,” I said, summarizing the posts. “Is it anyone’s birthday today? I can’t really remember…” I questioned as I clicked on Calendar. “Oh yeah, it’s Predictingpast’s this Friday. I’ve got to remember to give her a gift.”
Just then a small window popped up in the bottom right corner of my screen with a slight swooshing sound. “jerthereader has just signed in,” it read. “Cool, Jeremy’s on. I should check Magic Pens.” After finding no new posts on Bloglines, and no new comments on both my blog and the Magic Pens blog, I paused and pondered over what to do now. “Should I write, draw a picture, work on my guild, make a new tutorial…” The list went on.
All of a sudden, a new window popped up displaying the start of a new instant message conversation.
jerthereader: Have you gotten an invitation from a Jonathan Karma?
For a moment, I searched beneath the homework on my desk and snatched up my letter. “Jonathan Karma,” I read, just making sure before I replied.
hyperwire03: Yes, I did.
jerthereader: Any idea what it’s about?
I thought for a moment, tapping my fingers on my keys without applying enough pressure to actually press them, before typing on.
hyperwire03: No. All I know is that everyone else has already said they would be there, even Mr. Gifford.
jerthereader: You going?
hyperwire03: My dad’s not sure, but maybe.
jerthereader: Well, try and convince him then. Everyone else is going, so we might as well go too. I’ll give you a ride.
I paused for a moment to think. Maybe if I told my dad that I was going to get a ride and make sure that I emphasize that everyone else is going to be there…Maybe if I…
hyperwire03: Okay, I’ll try.
jerthereader: Great. See ya Saturday at half past four. Meet me at the gate.
I began to type a reply just as a dull face appeared beside “jerthereader has signed off”. Closing the instant messaging window, I then stared upon my blog. “Gah,” I said, dropping my head into my hands. “I want to go to this thing!” My eyes were scrunched down within my hands and a frown was upon my face. I felt so stressed and tired. I just wanted to go to sleep and forget about everything… I was tired of schoolwork, tired of homework, tired of everything. I brought my head up and stared at the palms of my hands. Turning them over, I shivered as I glanced at my fingernails, bringing up many memories of them lengthening and curling into sharpened claws. I quickly threw aside the thought of the pain of transformation with a shake of my head, and swiftly shut down my computer to walk around my room in thought.
After many thoughts, I stopped pacing and glanced around my room. Suddenly, I darted up my stairs, turned the corner and jumped up the second pair of stairs to our computer room. There, I found my dad on the computer in the cramped room. “Hey Dad,” I started.
“What?” he asked, not turning from the glowing monitor.
“Jeremy from Magic Pens said that he will give me a ride to the party thing this Saturday.” I paused as he turned to look at me, wondering what he was thinking.
“Did you tell him that you were going?” he asked, with a little anger in his voice.
“No!” I quickly replied trying to cease his anger from growing. “I was just checking my guild when he messaged me. He said that he will give me a ride at 4:30 at the gate.”
“Oh…” my dad said quietly. “So he’s going too?”
“Yeah…everyone’s going…Even Mr. Gifford.”
“Yeah, you told me that already. But nobody knows who this guy is, right?” he asked, bringing up the one thing that was keeping him from allowing me to go.
“Well, no, but Mr. Gifford thinks that we should go anyways. He’ll be there and…” I thought over what I could use to back up my story. “You know, College-Guy Matt, he’s going to be there too. Oh, and Shaundra is too, you know, one of the Magic Pens originals I told you about,” I added, trying to name off some of the older people.
“Oh, was she the one who wrote a lot before?” he asked, getting people mixed up as usual.
“No, that’s Terri…This is Shaundra, the one who likes vampires and stuff. You know that story I told you about with the mental patient and the hole in the ceiling thing,” I reminded him, refreshing his memory.
“Oh yeah, I know who you’re talking about.” I tell my dad everything about my life, except for my feelings and thoughts, and he knows all of friends along with the people from my guild and from Magic Pens. He just needed to be reminded at times as he got all the names mixed up and such. “So, College-Guy’s going to be there?” he asked, using the name that I had given Matt to help my dad remember who he was.
“Yeah, everyone is,” I continued a little weary now as it sounded as if my dad was still unconvinced.
“Well…” he said, still thinking and conjuring the words in his head. “I don’t know. I don’t want you going if you don’t know who this guy is.”
“So, I can’t go?” I confirmed.
“Well Noelle, nobody knows this guy. I don’t want you to get hurt or anything…” He paused as he had that tone of voice that meant that he didn’t like what he was doing. “I just don’t want you to go.” He returned to his computer, excusing me from the room and ending the conversation.
I stood there for a moment, just to make sure that it was his final decision before leaving the room and walking down the hallway, turning down the stairs. I glanced to my left at the stairs that went down into my room, but I didn’t want to go there just then. Instead, I turned right and walked past our living room and into our reading room. Surrounded by my mom’s figurines of unicorns and faeries scattered on her giant porcelain mountain and my dad’s dragons lurking around the bookshelves stuffed with books, I sat on the beige chaise and just thought. The reading room had always been my favorite room, especially for thinking.
I wasn’t allowed to go to the strange dinner party. I knew that I shouldn’t go for the safety of my friends. I wanted to go and I even felt that I needed to be there…
What was I to do? There, in the dim room amongst the fantastical creatures and stories, I thought of a plan.